Hey guys! Sorry I haven't posted anything in a while (a month; WOW!); I just started school again and it has kind of escaped my mind. Plus, the bulk of the time that I actually do write a new blog post is when I am currently having an anxiety attack, whether it is serious or mild. And unfortunately, this holds true now. I just got over a sudden attack which lasted about 30 minutes to an hour, but I am recovering now (on an knowledge-based note, this is common for OCD sufferers; they may be fine for the majority of the time, but they will often have short periods of intense worries and anxiety that quickly subside until they strike again).
I am not going to post a new entry about my specific OCD just yet (when I do, I will be talking about my 8th grade experience), but for now I am going to post a few good places to go for more professional OCD help. These are easy to access and have helped me greatly in the past:
http://www.ocduk.org/ - The primary focus of this website is the forums. I am a member there, and the people there are friendly and helpful. If you are to create an account and make threads, note that the rate of new threads being posted is very frequent (down to the very minute), so don't feel too bad if somebody posts a new thread right after you posted yours. Although I cannot guarantee that you will get a lot of helpful responses, most threads get at least 2 or 3 that will make you feel better. For you sufferers out there, give this site a shot!
http://www.ocfoundation.org/ - I just came across this site about an hour ago. I found this one really good subpage that talked about the general concept of doubt caused by OCD, and a lot of it lined up with what I am suffering from (mine is mainly about doubting myself, doubting the simplest of things, and a lack of self esteem). Unfortunately, I cannot pinpoint exactly which page that was, but yet I still took a gander at the other pages, and they are all quite helpful and specific.
https://www.youtube.com/user/everybodyhasabrain - This guy needs more publicity! What he says about OCD is less on the diagnostic side as the previous source was (relating to symptoms and such), but what he specializes in is simple strategies to help you relax yourself as well as tips on how to combat OCD. If you have a Youtube account and have not yet done so, SUBSCRIBE TO HIM!!!
http://www.anxietycentre.com/ - This website offers a wide variety of screening tests that can be done to give you an idea as to if you have any sort of anxiety disorder. There are a multitude of therapists here that can help you and offer a lot of good advice about helping with your symptoms.
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Friday, August 1, 2014
7th Grade
Oh boy! Did my OCD really start to show up during this year of school!
To start off the season, I had begun my first year of full-contact American football (this sport, for those of you unfamiliar with USA sports: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_football). I definitely enjoyed it for what it was worth, but at the same time I was a very small kid in general (especially compared to the majority of my team), and I was not particularly skilled at it yet. On the first day of full-contact I was excited, VERY EXCITED!
However, I soon learned that it was not easy going up against some other teammates, and boy did it hurt! During dinner that night, I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened earlier at practice; I felt so bad for myself and just wanted to go to practice the next day so that I could redeem myself. But simultaneously, I was still scared of getting hurt. One might ask, "what does this have to do with OCD and ruminations???"; well I will tell you.
Every day before practice I would worry and worry about what was going to happen on the field that night. Most kids would shrug it off (I assume), but I could not let it go, as I was always worried sick. I would go to practice that night, it would end, and then I would be relieved. At least until the next morning where I would then think about injuring myself and/or getting hurt very bad all throughout the day (school and all). Rinse and repeat! This continued on until the end of the season, at which time I could rest easy for another 9 or so months before the 8th grade football season kicks off...
The first semester continued: Thanksgiving, my birthday, and finally Christmas passed by without much trouble. For Christmas I had received a week-long trip to Hawaii at the beginning of Summer break, and that was by-far the best Christmas gift I had ever gotten. I was so excited for the rest of Winter break and the entirety of the second semester! But then, sometime around March or April, I began to stress out about my grades.
I am a very good student with an average GPA of 3.5 (maybe a little higher), but yet my school had a Summer school policy where if you didn't please in terms of your grades you had to, well, attend Summer school. So that is when I started worrying about my grades. I would stress out and get all sweaty on the simplest of quizzes or assignments because I knew that I had to succeed. My worries about grades never held-up and I could not stop doubting my ability to complete assignments and achieve a pleasing score on them. I just knew that I couldn't go to Summer school because I wanted to go on my trip so bad!
Luckily, I ended that school year with promising grades (as usual...) and had a great time on my trip. But in the following years, my ruminations and worries attributed to my OCD ballooned and got worse. Strangely, my worries were much less-so normal thoughts and were instead quite unusual (simply, stuff that people should not worry about)
To start off the season, I had begun my first year of full-contact American football (this sport, for those of you unfamiliar with USA sports: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_football). I definitely enjoyed it for what it was worth, but at the same time I was a very small kid in general (especially compared to the majority of my team), and I was not particularly skilled at it yet. On the first day of full-contact I was excited, VERY EXCITED!
However, I soon learned that it was not easy going up against some other teammates, and boy did it hurt! During dinner that night, I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened earlier at practice; I felt so bad for myself and just wanted to go to practice the next day so that I could redeem myself. But simultaneously, I was still scared of getting hurt. One might ask, "what does this have to do with OCD and ruminations???"; well I will tell you.
Every day before practice I would worry and worry about what was going to happen on the field that night. Most kids would shrug it off (I assume), but I could not let it go, as I was always worried sick. I would go to practice that night, it would end, and then I would be relieved. At least until the next morning where I would then think about injuring myself and/or getting hurt very bad all throughout the day (school and all). Rinse and repeat! This continued on until the end of the season, at which time I could rest easy for another 9 or so months before the 8th grade football season kicks off...
The first semester continued: Thanksgiving, my birthday, and finally Christmas passed by without much trouble. For Christmas I had received a week-long trip to Hawaii at the beginning of Summer break, and that was by-far the best Christmas gift I had ever gotten. I was so excited for the rest of Winter break and the entirety of the second semester! But then, sometime around March or April, I began to stress out about my grades.
I am a very good student with an average GPA of 3.5 (maybe a little higher), but yet my school had a Summer school policy where if you didn't please in terms of your grades you had to, well, attend Summer school. So that is when I started worrying about my grades. I would stress out and get all sweaty on the simplest of quizzes or assignments because I knew that I had to succeed. My worries about grades never held-up and I could not stop doubting my ability to complete assignments and achieve a pleasing score on them. I just knew that I couldn't go to Summer school because I wanted to go on my trip so bad!
Luckily, I ended that school year with promising grades (as usual...) and had a great time on my trip. But in the following years, my ruminations and worries attributed to my OCD ballooned and got worse. Strangely, my worries were much less-so normal thoughts and were instead quite unusual (simply, stuff that people should not worry about)
Saturday, July 19, 2014
What have I experienced??? 6th grade
Many OCD sufferers (as well as many online sources) claim that symptoms begin to intensify during the teen or young-adult years. If I recall correctly, my childhood was not affected at all by OCD; sure maybe I was a bit of a hypochondriac and checked physical symptoms online and in the mirror to help keep calm and assure myself that I was being overdramatic and that I did not just contract some form of a deadly disease, but other than that my OCD was relatively mellow.
The first real barrage of worries came in 6th grade. Remember the December 21, 2012 doomsday scare that everyone was talking about? Well I was deathly afraid of the world ending at that time (this is not limited to OCD sufferers; many individuals experience tension and anxiety about thoughts of death or the apocalypse. But those with OCD will have these bad thoughts overcome their daily life for prolonged periods of time), and I worried about it for months (the majority of the year actually). Every day I would wonder "is this a logical thing to believe?" and I would begin to question the scientists who disproved the theory (sometimes their words of wisdom were beneficial to me, other times not so much).
Every time something about 2012 came up, I would get sick with butterflies in my stomach, nervousness, and just all out fright. When would it ever end? Luckily, my obsessions were still rather mild at this time (although I was still scared stiff!), and eventually I set my worries aside for more important matters.Yes, I was still slightly concerned for what the future had to offer, but I got over it and as time went on my worries about 2012, while still existent, drifted away. The day where all was set to be destroyed came and went; from then on my fears about doomsday screeched to a halt. The next school year would be far more nerve-wracking when my OCD started to bloom.
Friday, July 18, 2014
Greetings OCD Sufferers!
Hello everyone. My name is Ryan Tesone. I am a current high school student who has, over the last couple of years, began to experience major symptoms of OCD. I am a sufferer, and I am intending to both help and recieve help for my occasional "anxiety peaks" that I experience from time to time. This will be a hopefully successful blog to teach people about the effects of Pure-O (obsessional OCD, which I have symptoms of) and to connect to others who unfortunately were given the gift (or lack thereof) of nonsensical worries, thoughts, and ruminations that won't seem to go away.
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